One of the most powerful prompts – no matter the context – is saying, “Tell me more” to another person. Students have so much to share about themselves, their interests and the personal worlds that they bring into the classroom every day – and all of it impacts their learning, imagination and goals. So finding those opportunities to say “Yes! Tell me more!” to each and every student is so important to me. And I want to create those opportunities starting on the very first day of the school year. 

This will be my 20th year in the classroom and my 12th year teaching fifth grade science. I’m always on the lookout for ways to refresh our get-to-know-you rituals in week one. That’s why I was so inspired to adapt educator @wasteofhumanity’s letter writing activity shared on TikTok to hear from my new students in their own words and help start our relationship off on solid footing. I want to share that activity with you, alongside a reflection you can use later in the year to help students build positive memories and look ahead to their next academic milestones. If you like, you can jump to those activities below. But first, let me share five things I’ve learned through these activities that help set myself and my students up for success.

1. Allow plenty of room for student choice 

I think we all benefit from having opportunities to consider how we want to be known in a new space and exercising choice about what we’re willing to share about ourselves as we build new relationships with others. I certainly do! That’s why – on top of the benefits we know that students’ freedom of choice has on their sense of agency, readiness to learn and ability to retain skills and information – I want to extend to my students the same sense of permission and openness that I cultivate for myself. 

Providing a range of options for our opening activities also supports and encourages my students who might be a bit reserved at the start of the year, helping them activate the sense of excitement they need to show up more fully and confidently throughout our time together.

2. Be compassionate and realistic with your time 

It’s easy to be very ambitious with activities, like the ones below, that call for more personalization. But I’ve learned to appreciate my own excitement for the fall and balance that against the experience I really want students to have. No matter how pumped I might be to try something new, overpromising or overextending myself in the very first week won’t set our classroom community up for success. But letting students know what to expect – and then following through on that – will. If you’d like to try these activities, consider the number of students in your class and the time commitment it will take to follow up with each child.

3. It’s ok to start small 

Don’t underestimate the difference that a small opportunity for sharing and reflection can make for your students and for you. Pared down activities without all the bells and whistles still make a meaningful difference in setting the tone for the year. If it’s not beautifully decorated, it’s still worth doing! If you don’t do every step, it’s still worth doing! You and your students can discover meaningful ways to come back to what you all learn through these activities throughout the year or for future classes.

4. Help students make the activity meaningful 

Like with any activity they haven’t seen before, students don’t always know what we’re asking for – or why we’re asking– and they need some sort of model in order to grasp it. Sharing stories with my class, like in the reflection activity below, allows me to provide some of that modeling without being over-prescriptive. 

Stories can thoughtfully frame the purpose for our activity and  make room for a lot of different attitudes and influences that students might be carrying. We can have a discussion together about what resonates with them from the characters’ journey and build a shared understanding of the task at hand that can accommodate a variety of experiences. Stories can even help preview the instructions so students have more clarity and confidence as they begin.

5. Let the activities fill your teacher cup too

Get-to-know-you and reflection activities are great reminders of my “why.” They help keep me curious about all my students’ experiences and about what they might carry forward from my class into the future. So far, none of my students have written about the water cycle or the states of matter in their letters and reflections. But they have written about times when they were down and a trusted adult helped pick them back up. Seeing those stories year after year, and re-reading them as part of my morning routine, helps fill my teacher cup and refuel my sense of purpose. If you try these activities, I hope they can pour into you and your students at the same time. 

Activity 1: First week letters

During opening week, I ask students to take a few minutes of class and write me a letter. They can choose what they want to write about from a list of options or include anything else they want me to know! Here’s a quick view of the options I provide to my class (with plenty of encouragement that they can choose what’s best and most exciting for them)! 

Then I set myself the task of handwriting an individual letter back to every child. I set a goal to give all students a written reply within about a week, when the memory of what they wrote in their letters is still fresh and they can still access the excitement of expecting a personal response. One important consideration is that sometimes I have 50 students and sometimes I have up to 100 – and I give myself some variability and grace with my exact response time. But I try to pace myself so that I can give all my response letters back to the class at once so that no student feels left out or forgotten.

In my letters, I respond to whatever each student chose to share with me, welcome them to my class and let them know how they can connect with me for encouragement and support. What matters most is responding to the specifics each child shares in their letter so that they have the opportunity to feel seen as the individual they are. My responses often look something like this: 

If a child mentions their favorite sports, I take a sentence or two to encourage them to pursue their sport, celebrate an accomplishment of their team in the last year or make another connection to the sport based on my own experience.

If a child mentions a goal for the year ahead – or a dream or wish for their last year in elementary school – I let them know that I’m excited about their goals and that I look forward to working with them and finding ways to help them progress toward that goal.

If a child mentions a challenge, or some aspect of the class they might be nervous about, I use the letter as an opportunity to offer a bit of reassurance or lift up one of our class expectations that might help provide the clarity they need to set their mind at ease.

This is a great exercise in not making assumptions about students’ experiences, what’s important to them or how they want to be seen in my classroom and in our school community. Students come to my class in their last year of elementary school, right on the cusp of a big transition in the next phase of their education and social development. Some of our students have gotten to know me and chat with me in previous years, but I can’t take it for granted that they automatically trust me, that they believe I see them for who they are and who they want to be, or that I understand their interests and challenges at this point in their lives. This activity in particular gives me the opportunity to learn more about who they are and what they are expecting from my class as well as what they’re expecting in their final year in elementary school – and all handwritten in their own words.

Having their interests, challenges, questions or even their worries right there in their letters also opens the door to future conversations about what they can do, what I can do and what their community can do to support their success down the road. And it provides an opportunity to promote students’ self reflection and to help them notice their own areas of growth and change as they approach key milestones and start thinking about the shift into middle school. I’m still discovering more ways to return to this letter throughout our time together and in conversation with families. And, in the meantime, I use a memory jar activity later in the year to continue encouraging thoughtful reflection and building a sense of support.

Activity 2: Memory jars

This activity is inspired by Vera Brosgol’s book “Memory Jars” and a fellow educator’s version of this activity I saw online. Many students already understand that moving to middle school is an important transition. But they may not have had the space to really consider their own experience and why the change will ultimately matter to them. The memory jar activity allows students to reflect on meaningful moments and on the ways that adults in their school community have been making a difference in their personal journeys, encouraging them to feel curious and supported moving into this next big change. 

I read Brosgol’s story about a little girl named Freda who wants to keep her favorite things – and people – with her all the time. Her grandmother tells her that she can save them in jars, like her favorite jam, and enjoy them whenever she likes. This story is a catalyst for my class to start thinking about how we can hold our experiences and encouragements close throughout life’s changes. 

As we talk about Freda’s journey, students can share the parts of the story that feel the most powerful to them. Together, we create space for a range of different experiences and feelings around making memories, saving memories and moving forward with a sense of feeling grounded in your own life story and the helpers in it – including all the teachers who’ve been a part of students’ stories so far!

Students choose one or as many teachers as they want, and write down their memories with them. Then, we collect everyone’s memories and put all those together in jars with each teacher’s name on them. Lastly, we set up a memento station from that year’s fifth grade class for teachers to visit and participate in enjoying those memories! 

I make sure to pass on these memories to teachers who have moved on from our school as well, so they can see how their impact continues to make a difference, even when they’re no longer in the building every day. 

I’m sure that both of these activities will continue to grow and change as I practice them with each new class, and I’m excited to see how students’ voices and stories continue to inspire my teaching practice in year 20 and beyond. What new reflection and connection activities will you explore this year?